5 questions with guest interviews


My name is Shani. I am 22 and I lost my dad to suicide when I was 11. As such, I try to do my best to help others and start a conversation around childhood bereavement that is both less stigmatised and more honest. 

I have generalised anxiety disorder and I am not ashamed of that. I use my Instagram blog @timemademestronger in order to reach out to others who are grieving/have mental health issues because it’s a great way to help each other.

I try and discuss a range of different topics so that my account is both varied and inclusive. I’ve had the account nearly a year and it’s been amazing to watch it blossom into all it is now. Hope to connect with even more of you all soon!!

1. How did you use your most painful experience into  something beautiful? 

I have always aimed to help people. The most painful experiences make us grow and mature - often more than we could possibly anticipate. I see it as a waste to not utilise this and help others. Losing my dad was hard, but now I know those thoughts and feelings all too well it makes sense to help others earlier in their journey, whether that is connected directly to bereavement or is a mental health issue. I believe we can all learn so much from each other. 

2. Do you believe in saying, "Time heals all wounds?" Why or why not? 

The saying ‘time heals all wounds’ is an interesting saying. My Instagram name derives from this obviously, but note that I don’t say it heals all wounds, just that it made me stronger. Time helps us heal and gives us perspective, it does not cure or take away the hurt completely. As much as we would all love for that to be the case, it’s better to focus on what time can do and the positives that come from it, rather than what it cannot. Time may not heal all wounds but it definitely makes us stronger.

3. What's a choice people see as a mistake you're so proud of? 

I think some people may see my approach to uni as a mistake. I stayed at home to save money and protect my mental health at the time. I often neglected my studies in favour of self care due to the immense pressure that was put on me. People may disagree with my lack of effort, especially towards the end, that resulted in my 2:2. I think my entire university approach has made me who I am today.

4. How different was your perspective of life back then from the one now? 

My life perspective changed immediately the day I lost my dad. It was essentially the day that I lost my childhood. But even then, I still had a lot of maturing to do. I think one thing that has changed in my perspective is the way I see people. I fully believe in the idea that some people come into our lives as a blessing and others a lesson. This year has truly taught me that. Most are lessons, but the ones that are blessings we should hold dear.

5. What's the best way you can cherish a memory of someone? 

The best way to cherish a memory of someone, I have found, is often not through tangible objects. It’s through forms of popular culture - their favourite music and films. It’s seeing yourself through their eyes. It’s noticing traits in yourself that were similar to theirs. It’s everything about your entire being and their entire being. In the end, objects mean nothing. Materialism is pretty futile. Our essence lives on the longest and I find memories of my dad there.

Thank you so much for reading and getting to know me!! 

Shani ❤


  1. Shani,

    Thank you so much for sharing with us a piece of your life and your wisdom. You are very inspiring and hopeful to others who can relate. Keep being that beacon of light to those who feel like they are in a dark place. Keep being amazing!

    xo Erica

    1. Right! Shani's amazing. Thank you for reading!


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